You always hear these stories about military wives transforming their lives with healthy eating during deployment. They lose all this weight, look more incredible than you ever thought was possible, and make you wonder how they did it all.
But then there’s a secret group of spouses who maintain the type of military wife deployment diet that no one really talks about. I know this secret group exists because I am in it. Hashtag confession number one.
For those of you who don’t know about this secret deployment diet, here is what secretly goes down:
1. Monday is frozen pizza.
If you are feeling particularly ambitious, you’ll get a take-out pizza from the gourmet Italian eatery around the corner (aka Dominos).
2. Tuesday is Thai food.
If you don’t have a local Thai place you love, Japanese or Chinese take-out is a perfectly acceptable substitution.
3. Wednesday is salad.
Have to eat something healthy mid-week to keep yourself going, and to combat feelings of guilt over eating take-out two nights in a row.
4. Thursday meet friends out to eat at local restaurant.
If you have kids, it’s probably some chain restaurant that serves below average food. If you don’t have kids, it’s still probably some chain restaurant that serves below average food. Let’s face it, there isn’t much choice around base.
5. Friday is wine. Just wine.
Yes. Wine is a fruit, which is a food group acceptable to consume all by itself. Although, if you are really looking to make it special, you’ll enjoy a side of cheese or chocolate alongside your glass. Hashtag keeping it classy.
6. Saturday is spouse’s choice.
Whatever you’re in the mood for. Maybe you cook. Maybe you make a sandwich. Or maybe you grab another bite out to eat.
7. Sunday is something made from scratch.
Gotta fit in at least one home cooked meal per week. Grill some chicken, potatoes and make another salad. Seems good enough. Right?
8. And last but not least…breakfast consists of coffee and chocolate.
Coffee and chocolate OR coffee and cookies becomes a regular staple in the morning. Maybe not every day, but at least two or three times per week. And if you have kids, breakfast occurs before they wake up because no good parent would teach their kids that eating chocolate for breakfast is a good idea.
The best part about this secret military wife deployment diet no one talks about is that you actually loose just as much weight during deployment AND you didn’t spend any money on all that fancy healthy food. Basically, you skip lunch and eat a small breakfast, so eating take-out for dinner almost all week pretty much evens itself out.
Homecoming arrives and your military homecoming outfit looks fabulous! Everyone wonders how you lost a few pounds and fit into your skinny jeans.
Don’t worry. I won’t tell them how you did it.
Want more on military life?
- 10 Things Strong Military Spouses Do Differently
- The Best Advice for the Military Girlfriend
- I’m Terrible at Being a Military Spouse
- Military Base Gate Etiquette: 10 Small Ways to Avoid a Giant SNAFU
What’s your best military wife deployment diet secret? Let’s chat in the comments!