Mom LifeWhen I my son was first born, I struggled immensely. Everything felt so overwhelming. Life with a newborn was not so easy-peasy for this mama.
And then at 6 weeks everything changed.
We put our son on a schedule and we never looked back. In addition to creating a schedule we did several other things—swaddling, encouraging full feedings, gentle self-soothing techniques—and very quickly things started to turn the corner.
Fast-forward to nearly two years later and my son is still on an approximate schedule each day. He sleeps and eats and plays on a somewhat similar schedule each day. I use the word approximate, of course, because he isn’t a robot.
From babyhood to toddlerhood, he is happy, healthy, thriving, and sleeping well. Running a good stay-at-home mom schedule has worked wonders for my marriage, my child, and for my own sanity as a mom.
A fellow blogger shared a post last week about helping your newborn sleep better in the long run, and many of the techniques we used in our own home were touched on in the article. We used many of the ideas safely, responsibly, and of course, threw in a good dose of common sense when using these concepts. They just worked really well for both our child and our family.
But then there were several comments about this post that were…well…really tough.
Parenting is tough. It’s polarizing sometimes.
I’m not here to debate about this topic or any parenting topic though. I’m not here to convince you that you should do it one way or another.
Today as a parent, I just needed to say that whether you chose to schedule or co-sleep or eat brownies for breakfast, you are doing a great job. Today as a parent, I just want to ignore all our differences.
Parenting is not one-size fits all. Parenting is not my way or the highway. You can be crunchy or conventional or free range and still have your kids come out thriving.
What we all need is common sense parenting.
To acknowledge what is working for our family and what is not. To look at our children and our family as a whole and make adjustments. Parenting decisions are not set in stone. You can do it one way and then change it to best fit the needs of your family.
We all make judgment calls every day when it comes to parenting. Heck, many days I parent with a different style than I did just the day prior. Because that is what my best judgement and instincts as a mother told me to do. I think many parents regularly change things up to discover what works best, and then strive for consistency thereafter.
I think we all have a common goal and desire…we are all putting our hearts and souls into raising our kids well, even when we are doing things differently than one another.
What we all need is parents who support our differences.
Some of my closest friends parent differently than I do. Some parents are far more into the natural parenting realm than we are. Some parents are more conventional than we are. I like to think we are somewhere in the middle.
But at the end of the day, what does it matter if someone parents a little bit different?
Why can’t we parent in different ways and still reach across the table and say you are doing an awesome job?
Why can’t I support a mother in her parenting journey, even when it isn’t the same as mine?
Why can’t we all just have a group hug?
Want more on motherhood?
- What Kids Secretly Want to Tell You About Roughhousing — Girls Included!
- Dear Moms of Toddlers
- 8 Things Only a Mother Would Do One-Handed
What do you think about ignoring our parenting differences? Let’s chat in the comments!
Great post, don’t you wish everyone thought that way? I’m sure there are some days I’m messing up my kids, but each day is another day to try do do better and learn what works for you. Hugs to you in Japan, your’re doing an awesome job 🙂
Yes. Exactly! It would be so encouraging if everyone adopted this philosophy.
Great post! And I’ll go even further… I have four kids, and between them they had the whole spectrum of parenting. My second daughter was into “natural parenting”, so I followed….she ate whenever and how much she wanted, she slept with me most of the time for the first four years of her life and she is now a heathly, well-adapted 9-year old. My son needed, wanted a schedule. He liked his feedings on time, will only sleep in his own bed at fairly fixed times. He doesn’t like to co-sleep, although he will climb into bed in the morning to cuddle. He eats full meals, and no in-betweens…
And yes, he too is now a healthy well-adapted 3-year old 😉
Go mommies xx
Yes, exactly. All kids are different. I think your experience is similar to many other parents. Can’t we all just offer a pat on the back instead of meaning mean and ugly to one another? I think we agree.